Tag Archives: Twitter

7 New Year’s RID-solutions to Ponder

2 Jan

 

Woo Hoo! 2015!

Got resolutions?

I’ve got RID-solutions!

BarbBestHumor

Good luck!

 

In 2015, let’s say Bye-Bye to…

1.      Denial.  “I’ll just have one more chocolate covered cherry because, after all, it’s a vital part of celebrating holiday traditions and participating in the pursuit of freedom.”

2.    Pride. I will not become irritated when I lose at tennis even though a) it is obviously my partner’s fault b) the sun is in my eyes c) I had too much coffee for breakfast d) not enough coffee e) I have a calf cramp f) I’m not wearing my lucky socks. […]

7 Celebrity Products We’d Like To See

7 Oct

Bruce Jenner

Bruce Jenner (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

Do celebrities annoy you?

The narcissists who never cease to amaze us with their sheer lack of restraint?

Thanks to an avalanche of 24-7 celebrity “news”

we are bombarded with celebrity drama queens’ constant cry for attention.

They appear. They promote. They publicize.

They SELL, SELL, SELL!

7 CELEBRITY PRODUCTS WE’D LIKE TO SEE

[…]

Physically Fit? 7 Clues You’re NOT in Good Shape

1 Oct

Are you physically fit & healthy?

physically fit, in shape, healthy

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Are you in good shape?

Do you feel strong?

Take the quiz…

7 Clues… You’re NOT So Physically Fit

  • Texting tires you.
  • Your blood type is no longer B+   It’s D-

[…]

I Feel Your Salmonella Pain

26 Aug

 

This week,

I was going to write a scholarly (yet hilarious and insightful) treatise on the societal impact of dual hula hoop and ice bucket challenge addictions…

but I was deterred – and perhaps sickened – by the latest salmonella peanut-almond butter scare.

EXHIBIT A:  My jar of almond butter fingered by the FDA.  Selected for it’s superior nutritional value. It’s so tasty, too!

 

Almond Butter […]

I Feel Your Pain – Technical Support

26 Jul

 

We hope that your session with Technical Support was helpful.

Here is the transcript you requested.

Krandeep:  Thank you for contacting Time Warner-Verizon-Sprint-Charter-Cox Cable. Give me a minute while I access your account.

Me: (grumble, grumble)

Krandeep: Thank you for waiting. Hello Ms. Best. How are you today?

Me: In a nutshell… fairly frustrated.

Krandeep: Great to know that.

Me: If I miss the RHONY finale this evening, I’ll never speak to Time Warner-Verizon-Sprint-Charter-Cox Cable again. I’ll have to steal – I mean stream – all my precious TV shows on the internet like the dead broke – I mean budget-minded – Millennials.

Krandeep: Okay, thank you for that information. […]

7 Signs Your Dog and Your Cat are Gifted!

12 Jul

Yippee! It’s a summer rerun 😀

Cats and dogs

have taken over the internet and social media. Their furry mugs are everywhere…  YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr, Pinterest. Today Wattpad – tomorrow the world.

There must be a reason for this. Maybe they are really smart?

Perhaps brighter than your average couch potato.

We humans are not always the sharpest swizzle sticks in the mini-bar drawer.

Skip I.Q. tests and tedious assessments. Cats and dogs can be identified as gifted by their families. Is your Monty or Muffy gifted?

Here are 7 Signs Your Cat or Dog is Gifted

  • Your pet reveals originality in expression.

“Look, my cat sent me a Valentine. He’s so clever.” […]

Pun for All? Sounds Fishy To Me

15 Jun

 

Do you like puns?

Do you enjoy punning?

Is it true that a pun is the lowest form of wit?

Is a pun fun?

I love the wordplay involved, and even if the pun is a painfully obvious one… I appreciate the intent and the effort.

It’s my observation that most boys/men tend to appreciate punning more than most girls/women, or say, your average cocker spaniel.

Why is this? Perhaps because the male species is accustomed to playing with… their food?  Their cars? Or whatever?

 

Barb Best Humor Blog

At The Reel Inn restaurant in Malibu, CA they celebrate the pun on their “Special of the Day” menu board out in front.

Fun Signs I have spotted:

“Catfish In The Rye”

“Grouper Therapy”

“Go ahead. Mako my day!”

“Weapons of Bass Destruction”

and

“Tuna Guitar.”

Here’s to more restaurants with a sense of play! Bon appetitter.

Home cocker spaniel

Home cocker spaniel (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Join me on Twitter where anything – including all kinds of pun – goes! I’m @HaBarb

 

25 MORE Reasons I DON’T Sleep!

10 Apr

 

Damn, I’m tired!  Are you, too?

Are YOU getting enough sleep? What keeps YOU up at night?

SRGot Sleep

25 MORE Reasons I Can’t Sleep!

1) Dog needs to pee.

2) I need to pee… again.

3) The cat suffers from restless leg syndrome and is kicking me in the private parts.

4) Celebrity baby names […]

7 Signs Your Cats and Dogs Are Gifted

1 Feb

 

Cats and dogs

have taken over the internet. Their furry mugs are everywhere…  YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr, Pinterest. Today Wattpad – tomorrow the world.

There must be a reason for this. Maybe they are really smart?

Perhaps brighter than your average couch potato.

We humans are not always the sharpest swizzle sticks in the mini-bar drawer.

Skip I.Q. tests and tedious assessments. Cats and dogs can be identified as gifted by their families. Is your Monty or Muffy gifted?

Here are 7 Signs Your Cat or Dog is Gifted

  • Your pet reveals originality in expression.

“Look, my cat sent me a Valentine. He’s so clever.” […]

Gratitude With An Attitude

29 Nov

 

BarbBestPhotoCredit

 

Like many, I am acutely aware of being grateful – health, family, friends, pets, laughter, chocolate, caffeine, a working internet connection – are obviously priceless.

 

In honor of the whole “Give Thanks” thing… I’ve been keeping a Gratitude Journal… 7 Notes:

 

* Am grateful that a migraine attack only lasts a day.

 

* Thankful Aunt Carrie puts a truckload of bourbon in the yam soufflé.  Can you say “Pass the potatoes!” fast five times… fast enough? […]