Tag Archives: sex

Everything I Know About Sex… I Learned From My Cat

24 Oct

 

I was going to pontificate here upon how Justin Bieber is influenced by Nietzsche‘s views of women, but who cares?

EVERYTHING I Know About SEX & ROMANCE I Learned From My CAT…

 

Kenyon Cox, Nude study, 1896, Kenyon Cox was a...

Kenyon Cox, Nude study, 1896, Kenyon Cox was a strong advocate of figurative art. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

  • Stake out your territory and stand firm.
  • A sense of mystery adds to your allure.
  • If it feels good, purr and vibrate.
  • Holding a loved one close and feeling his/her beating heart is romantic as long as your arm/leg/brain hasn’t gone numb.
  • Seafood is not a bad aphrodisiac. […]

Weekend Funny 5 More Signs Death Is Near

28 Sep

5 More Signs “Death” Is Near!

1.  Location. Location. Location. You are reclining in a cozy donut pool float, gloriously buzzed on Jamaican rum cocktails, drifting in the balmy blue Caribbean… but a hungry shark has a hankering for your pricey, dutifully applied 70 SPF face lotion.

2.  Politics. You’ve stopped screaming like a banshee at the election year coverage on the cable news channels.

3.  Loss of thirst for your favorite wine, Chateau St. Jean French Chardonnay. Say it ain’t so.

4.  Sex. You no longer consider vaginal rejuvenation a viable option.

5.  Money. Compulsive couponing has lost its charm. You really can’t take that extra 15 cents with you? Damn.

7 Signs Death Is Near

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I Feel Your Pain by Barb Best is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

HARO My Answer To A Stupid Vagina Question

12 Sep

Inspired by Naomi Wolf‘s controversial book, “Vagina: A New Biography,”

this is a real question from Monday’s HARO (Help A Reporter Out):

“Do You Have a Healthy Relationship With Your Vagina?” (Frugivore)

My response:

Thank you for asking! This is a question dear to my heart, “in-ny” belly button, and G Spot.

Oh yes, my vagina and I enjoy many lovely times together. We walk on the beach, we contemplate beautiful sunsets, we share moonlit dinners on the Palazzo. My goodness, we even shower together on a regular basis (wink, wink).

We rarely have cross words, however once a month things can get a little touchy. You know what I mean.

But most of the time, my vagina has a terrific sense of humor.  Why when I’m down, she makes me laugh.  She lifts me up.

Geez, the most awe-inspiring time we had was when we gave birth together! Wow! Hard to top that.

Maybe my vagina will write a memoir some day.  She’s actually quite gifted.  The title can be: “Vaginas Just Wanna Have Fun.”

 

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I Feel Your Pain by Barb Best is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

More stupid questions – and stupid answers at stupidasssquestions.com

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Weekend Funny 5

7 Sep

It’s hot! Molly Campbell has a funny new book out “Characters In Search of A Novel.” Get it HERE

The New Yorker: Test Your Fashion I.Q. with Paul Rudnick

Hilarious post “Stuff People Say To New Moms” by “occasional optimist” Laura at Stroller Parking Only

Mental Floss: “17 Euphemisms for SEX From The 1880s” by Adrienne Crezo.  Clever!

Loretta LaRoche and “The Power of Humor” by Dr. Mehmet Oz at Oprah.com

BarbBestHumor

 

 

 

 

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Weekend Funny 5

20 Jul

It’s the weekend again.  We all need a break.

5 quick links for you:

“Celebrity Smile”

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