Tag Archives: eating

Binge on Holiday Food: Death by Fruitcake

7 Dec

Holiday Food Binge: Death by Fruitcake

Want to die doing what you love? Eating!

How about binging on the irresistible holiday treats that are ubiquitous this time of year?

Four out of five sugar addicts agree – holiday food is the best way to go.

Death by fruitcake humor blog

 

Fruitcake Binge

Like ukulele music, you either love fruitcake or you hate it.

There are at least two ways to die via fruitcake. […]

Bellyache: Guess Who Came To Dinner

13 May

 

In a perfect world…

You would not celebrate your birthday at a trendy Euro-Asian restaurant touted for it’s delicious, yet healthy dishes and end up in the emergency room 9 hours later with food poisoning. You would not require an I.V.with anti nausea, anti diarrhea, anti pain meds to stop the total body torture.

 

Uninvited: Guess Who Came To Dinner

 

In a perfect world…

You would not cook that special recipe for the in-laws – Quinoa Masala Royale – using infected organic vegetables. Later that evening, our family members would not all coincidentally experience unbearable abdominal cramps normally associated with childbirth. After all, you are a lousy cook, but not that lousy.

In a perfect world…

Our food would make us well, not sick.

[…]

Happy Holidays: Eating Tips To Ignore

25 Nov

 

The holidays are upon us… actually, they are in our face.

Holiday Advice Food Humor

There is a ton of advice out there on how not to overeat on Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hannukah, Kwanza, New Year’s Eve, New Year’s Day, and every other holiday you can imagine.

Tips like, “NO seconds,” “Drink ONLY water,” “During your meal, go to the bathroom, look in the mirror, and guilt yourself about how many calories you’re taking in,” “Fill up on celery and radishes – stay away from the dip,” and “Do planks and push-ups between courses.”

Pull-ease! Gratification is the whole point.

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