Tag Archives: Disney

April Fools Sh*t Show: National Humor Month

1 Apr

April Fools Sh*t Show: National Humor Month

Welcome to the April Fools Sh*t Show

OMG. A pandemic!

And you thought the worst thing about April would be paying your taxes?

 

April Fools Pandemic

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In case we all missed it, National Humor Month is here.  Whoopee!

How to celebrate?

How ’bout a month of lock-down, confinement with family and pets (if you’re lucky), unparalleled gut-wrenching anxiety, and mindless navel gazing?

A Sh*tstorm

is “a very unpleasant or difficult situation.”

Ah, don’t you love British understatement?

Patience

Remember – “April showers hitting the fan may bring May flowers and nagging allergies.”

Amusement & Good News

It’s high time to add some amusement to the misery.

Check out John Krasinski and his Good News

 

 

Look, ma! Disney Amusement Park rides on YouTube! And no lines!

 

Be patient and don’t become a patient.

News to Amuse – 7 Items that Won’t Stress You Out

Lessons: Evacuating from an Active Wildfire Zone

30 Nov

There are many lessons to be learned when evacuating from an active wildfire zone.

Wildfire

“Wind’s in the East…mist coming in.

Like something is brewing, about to begin.

Can’t put my finger…on what lies in store, but I fear what’s to happen all happened before.”

– Bert in Mary Poppins

Dick Van Dyke Barb Best

 

 

Breathe

Remember to breathe!  But only with a N95 respirator mask so you can screen out hazardous gases such as carbon monoxide, formaldehyde, acrolein, and random farts.

Soot happens. You’ll likely resemble Dick Van Dyke as Bert the chimney sweeper in Mary Poppins.

[…]

FUN MOVIE: “Alice Through the Looking Glass!”

22 Jun

 

LOOKING for a FUN movie?

LOOK no further than Disney’s “Alice Through the Looking Glass” – the sequel to the blockbuster film “Alice in Wonderland.”

The combo of live-action and animation, exciting visual effects, adventure, surreal set design, fun characters, and lighthearted wordplay creates an amusing entertainment that’s hard to resist.

Screenwriter Linda Woolverton (Beauty and the Beast, Lion King, Homeward Bound, Alice In Wonderland, Maleficent) crafted an intriguing tale (loosely based on Lewis Carroll’s book “Through the Looking Glass, and What Alice Found There”) featuring a strong, independent Alice and your favorite witty characters from “Alice in Wonderland.”

You’ll love the clever humor, plus the puns and quips about “time.”

“Alice Through the Looking Glass!” is like a fun party we’re all invited to…

now, that’s my cup of tea 🙂 […]

20 Tips from My Snarky Teen

7 Aug

ICYMI

Tina Fey‘s 5 year old daughter Alice says crazy funny things all the time. She’s constantly cracking Tina up. How cute!

Did I say… she’s five?

As daughters become older, they become increasingly brutal entertaining and wise – especially with their advice.

parenting

 

Tips From My Teen

  •   Lose the Carol Brady haircut.
  •   Nothing dates you more than saying “groovy.”
  •   Don’t chat with the grocery store cashier like she’s a long lost BFF.

[…]

Prescription Drug Name or Disney Character?

17 Sep

iStock_000007289224Large

What’s in a name? In a prescription drug name?

Drug companies sell directly to the consumer/patient/poor schlub like me via TV commercials.

Doctors now take prescription requests.

“Doc, I saw this snazzy, sexy ad for “Beallus” that was shot on the beach in Hawaii. God, I’m in pain.

I’d like to try some of that! Pen me a prescription, will you?”

The prescription drug names are cool and catchy. They promise an orgasmic paradise, a spa experience, a pain-free existence.

But… many drug names sound like Disney characters to me. […]

Snarky Tips from My Teen

15 Oct

Tina Fey‘s 5 year old daughter Alice says crazy funny things all the time. She’s constantly cracking Tina up. How cute!

Did I say… she’s five?

As daughters become older, they become increasingly brutal entertaining and wise – especially with their advice.

parenting

 

Tips From My Teen

  •   Lose the Carol Brady haircut.
  •   Nothing dates you more than saying “groovy.”
  •   Don’t chat with the grocery store cashier like she’s a long lost BFF.
  •   Don’t pay for HBO. Watch TV on your computer for free.
  •   Chill.
  •   Ordering hummus in a restaurant is wrong on many levels.
  •   No matter how whimsical you feel, leave the glitter eye shadow to Disney Pop Stars.
  •   Don’t respond to a text message right away – it looks desperate.
  •   “The Beatles” is a lousy name for a band. Get over it.
  •   Too much make-up on 5 year olds and 50 year olds is equally as scary.
  •   Chill.
  •   If you slept with JFK or Warren Beatty, I DON’T want to hear about it. I don’t even know who Warren Beatty is.
  •   Baggy pants make you look like OMG you’re wearing a diaper.
  •   Don’t panic if you can’t understand WTF your laptop is doing.
  •   Study a texting dictionary (online) of acronyms so you understand the “newfangled” lingo.
  •   Coddling the cat/dog like he’s a human child strikes many as needy.
  •   Stop with the Viva Viagra jokes. It’s LOL pathetic.
  •   Anyone seriously considering an eyebrow transplant is much older than they think they are.
  •   Sudoku is no substitute for a real hobby like windsurfing or limbo skating.
  •   Chill.


Creative Commons License
I Feel Your Pain by Barb Best is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Enhanced by Zemanta