Summer Fun = Playing in Water
A few thoughts on Water Fun
- The wacky noodle water toy is neither an effective weapon nor a successful flotation device. However, it makes a tasty appetizer for sharks. BTW… you are the main course.
- A life vest is not slimming. If you wear one, you will resemble a pregnant marshmallow. However, it beats getting all wet and drowning in the ocean.
- While kayaking, if you are swept over a damn – it is socially acceptable to curse like a bipolar rapper off his meds. Of course, it pretty much is common practice anytime, anywhere, anyway. F*#! yeah?
Glub. Glub. Water up your nose?
- There is a drought in Hollywood, but you wouldn’t know it with the proliferation of isolation tanks. De-stressing is serious business! Preschoolers have their plastic bath toys; celebrities have their isolation tanks.
- Dogs who surf are way too cool for me.
- A refreshing “mocktail” is not my idea of an adult beverage. Geez, is everyone fresh out of rehab or on a cleanse?
- Those neon Crocs plastic clogs are an assault on fashion, and should be worn only with a clown nose.
Have water fun this summer, and ignore that dumb rule about waiting an hour after you eat to swim. They were wrong about eggs, butter, and toasting in the sun.
For even more fun than you can handle, follow me on twitter… @HaBarb