I Feel Your Pain – Technical Support

26 Jul


We hope that your session with Technical Support was helpful.

Here is the transcript you requested.

Krandeep:  Thank you for contacting Time Warner-Verizon-Sprint-Charter-Cox Cable. Give me a minute while I access your account.

Me: (grumble, grumble)

Krandeep: Thank you for waiting. Hello Ms. Best. How are you today?

Me: In a nutshell… fairly frustrated.

Krandeep: Great to know that.

Me: If I miss the RHONY finale this evening, I’ll never speak to Time Warner-Verizon-Sprint-Charter-Cox Cable again. I’ll have to steal – I mean stream – all my precious TV shows on the internet like the dead broke – I mean budget-minded – Millennials.

Krandeep: Okay, thank you for that information.

Me: This is the fifth time I’ve called this week.

Krandeep: Thank you for your loyalty to Time Warner-Verizon-Sprint-Charter-Cox Cable.

Me: Loyalty has nothing to do with it. Good thing you don’t control my cell phone.

Krandeep: (sinister laughter)

Me: I hate you, but I have an emergency here. The cable box doesn’t work. The signal is jumbled.

Krandeep: I understand you’re experiencing some issues with the cable card we installed last week.

Krandeep: I am going to send a refresh signal to your equipment.

Krandeep: First, you will have to power cycle the cable box.

Me: Power cycle?

Krandeep: Unplug and replug.

Krandeep: One moment please.

Krandeep: Thank you for waiting. Make sure the tuning adapter acquires network lock and is solidly illuminated.

Me: Uh… which is the tuning adapter?

Krandeep: The MTR700.

Me: ???

Krandeep: Please let me know when the process is finished.

Me: I pay Time Warner-Verizon-Sprint-Charter-Cox Cable over $200 a month so I don’t need to know what an MTR700 is… let alone be on intimate terms with one.

Krandeep: Thank you for waiting. I was on five other calls.

Krandeep: Is the yellow indicator light on your MTR700 blinking?

Me: What is my MTR700?

Krandeep: That is correct. The MTR700 is the tuning adapter.

Me: I see no blinking lights – except for the flashes on my eyeballs from my impending migraine.

Krandeep: Ms. Best. I am going to break down and send a technician to your house, in order to check what this issue is.

Krandeep: Let me check it, please.

Me: They could have been here by now. The Real Housewives of New York City waits for no one!

Krandeep: Thank you for waiting. The soonest appointment will be for next Friday between 3:00 p.m. and never.

Me: Never? Never?

Krandeep: I sorry. I meant nine o’clock. Believe it or not, English isn’t my first language.

Me: Never. Never sounds good.


I feel your pain! Let’s titter on Twitter… I’m @HaBarb  😀


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6 Responses to “I Feel Your Pain – Technical Support”

  1. Eve Gaal July 26, 2014 at 6:52 pm #

    I have soo been in your shoes. Fortunately I have a male interceptor/adapter at the house to make calls that might give me a stroke.

    • Barb Best July 27, 2014 at 12:34 pm #

      HA! Sometimes the male interceptor/adapter gives you a stroke.

  2. Carol Cassara July 27, 2014 at 2:55 pm #

    i get it. same kind of experience. uggh.

  3. ditchthebun July 27, 2014 at 10:57 pm #

    I hate those type of calls. The best thing I never did was get cable 🙂 Although I am kind of enjoying it while I am staying with my parents I must admit hahaha

    • Barb Best July 28, 2014 at 8:24 pm #

      That is funny!

  4. Diane Holcomb July 28, 2014 at 9:39 am #

    This isn’t customer service. It’s customer torture! Ye gads.

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