How To Be Really Miserable

21 Mar

 

Woe is me.

As relationship expert and best-selling author Margaret Paul, PhD. writes at HuffPost Healthy Living, “While life is often challenging, lonely and heartbreaking, misery is a choice.”

HERE ARE MY 7 TIPS  – HOW TO BE REALLY  MISERABLE

  • Wear Spanx underwear daily, preferably in a size too small.  (Guess what? It’s ALL a size too small.)
  • Read, listen to, or watch The News. This applies especially to anything remotely political.  (Ugh. It’s ALL political.)
  • Deprive yourself of chocolate before noon.  (Cocoa Puffs were created for a reason.)
Cocoa Puffs

Cocoa Puffs (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

  • Sit at the computer all day.  (ALL day? You may be suffering from FOMO addiction – or worse yet – you are writing a book.)
  • Sit at the computer all day and smoke, fume, or otherwise heat yourself up.  (This can cause spontaneous combustion – a very bad way to go.)
  •  Sweat the wee stuff – unless you’re referring to cancer cells or bedbugs.
  • Build sandcastles in the air.  (The foreclosure rate is astronomically high.)

Good news! Happiness is also a choice.

Salut!

Salut!

 

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I Feel Your Pain by Barb Best is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License

 

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5 Responses to “How To Be Really Miserable”

  1. Cathy Turney March 21, 2013 at 7:04 pm #

    Tooooo funny, Barb! Wine does mitigate the news! (That’s why I don’t read the paper until night time!) Looking forward to meeting you at the NSNC convention!

    • Barb Best March 21, 2013 at 7:32 pm #

      Thanks, Cathy. Wine is often a good idea. Glad you’ll be there in Hartford!

  2. Jen March 24, 2013 at 3:42 am #

    Spanx always do feel a size too small. They are a necessary evil. Love the list!

  3. Lisa Newlin March 25, 2013 at 10:10 pm #

    In the same vein as the Spanx suggestion, may I also suggest drinking copious amount of fluid while wearing said Spanx, so you have to pee every 10 minutes? Wait. No. That’s not “How to be miserable.” That’s “How to push yourself to the breaking point.”

    My bad.

    I need to write a follow up post to my one about Spanx and talk about the efforts to pee in those things. Torture.

    • Barb Best March 27, 2013 at 10:22 am #

      Thanks, Lisa. LOVE your funny BlogHer post on Spanx HERE

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