Is Your Pet a Party Pooper?

4 Jan


Pets… can’t live with them; can’t live without them.

FYI – I am both a dog person and a cat person.

Dogs will swallow anything (you know what I mean).

However, we expect more from cats. They are the mere embodiment of discernment. They control their unbridled enthusiasm. They appreciate understatement. They are refined.  Above all, they are really fussy eaters.

But, no. On the busiest party night of the year, pussy cat has swallowed something festive and is decking the halls with projectile vomit and decorating the hearth with (use your imagination).

Ho. Ho. Ho. Forget that fancy dinner dance with “A” list celebrities. Forget the overpriced, hand sequined killer outfit you bought for this special occasion. Forget the stardust and forgive the feline. We’re off to see the ER vet!

Segregation for dogs and cats? Is that legal? And how can we manage that in our home?

Just in case...

Hours of (human) distress ensues. Rectal temperatures are taken. Poking and prodding occurs… Although now the cat seems to be feeling much better. Especially after he regurgitates a piece of “the ribbon.”

Exhibit A. “The Ribbon”


Exhibit B & C. The X-Rays. On the side. On the back. You get the picture.

Look! I see my missing flash drive containing my masterpiece 4500 page novel. Oh, and isn’t that my lost diamond earring? I’ve searched everywhere! Hmmm. Nice bone structure.


Vet tells us he sees “suspicious gas patterns” on X-Ray. May need to do surgery. Says this with a straight face.

Cat wisely makes spontaneous recovery. Escapes the knife, but a stinky cheese ball and a spheroid of hair, tinsel, and curly Q ribbon were extracted from his… TMI?

Feline is fine… much healthier than our credit card balance. Wink, wink.

BarbBestWinkIMG_4071 - Version 2

Hey…. I’ve got a great idea! Maybe Obamacare can cover pets, too?

Cats in Sunglasses

Cats in Sunglasses (Photo credits: Giphy)

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7 Responses to “Is Your Pet a Party Pooper?”

  1. Valerie Rind January 4, 2014 at 6:04 pm #

    Barb, I do feel your pain. My cat had an ultrasound and is scheduled for an endoscopy. He has more specialists than I do. Is it too late to become a vet? Seems to be a lucrative career. Hope your cat is feeling better!

    • Barb Best January 4, 2014 at 7:02 pm #

      An endoscopy? Ah, hope your feline is feeling fine soon!

  2. turkeymickey January 4, 2014 at 6:51 pm #

    Oh Barb, this made me LOL!! The part about the cat wisely making a spontaneous recovery and escaping the knife….you must have a very smart cat…and I’m a dog person.

    • Barb Best January 4, 2014 at 7:04 pm #

      Thank you! Cats are smart like a fox… how’s that for pinning the tail on the donkey?

  3. Jeanette January 6, 2014 at 11:34 am #

    Yep – we are dog and cat people too. We have also fished my diamond pinky ring out of Auggie-doggie’s poop! Hubby wouldn’t do it – he picked up with plastic bag, but the “fishing” was clearly my job! Believe me, I was happy to rescue my ring!! Pet insurance a thought, but methinks it’s better just to have a slush fund for emergency vet visits.

  4. Diane January 6, 2014 at 12:01 pm #

    Hope your feline friend has decided that his foray into dog-like-eating-behavior is enough for one lifetime 🙂

  5. Suzanne Lucas January 23, 2014 at 1:36 pm #

    Clearly your kitty is a discerning eater because he chose the RED curly ribbon. Has to be pretty, you know.

    Glad to see he’s feeling better.

    PS: Is he winking in that picture?

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