Advice You Know You Want It

27 Feb

 

Who needs advice from Dear Abby or Oprah

when everyone has their two cents worth?

English: Dear Abby star on the Hollywood Walk ...

English: Dear Abby star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

WTH HERE’S MINE :-D

  • Don’t hire a life coach who doesn’t have a life – or at least a nice dog.
  • Never go to the grocery store at noon on a Monday – it’s such a good time for a lemon cleanse anyway – not.
  • If you insist upon racing snowboards or motorcycles – make sure you have health insurance and someone to drive you to your doctor’s appointments for five months.
  • If you can’t stand the heat in the kitchen – don’t cook. Order take-out.
  • Remember – menopause passes, but male mid-life crisis is forever.
  • Don’t go to a shrink whose pooch is on Prozac.
  • Don’t let your kids play in the street – unless it’s Wall Street and they are math geniuses.
  • Kale can be chopped into itsy bitsy teeny weeny pieces and hidden in lime pudding – but kids won’t eat lime pudding either… so skip it.
  • Never take diet tips from an “expert” who wears Plus Size clothing. They know everything that doesn’t work.
  • When a cat says “NO!” – he means “NO!”  There is NO negotiating with a feline.
  • Hall’s Cough Drops give advice – “A Pep Talk In Every Drop” – via the wrappers.  At least they don’t say, “You Suck.”

 

AdviceBarbBest

 

Justin Bieber fans

And don’t forget to floss after arrests.

 

See you on Twitter… I’m @HaBarb

Creative Commons License
I Feel Your Pain by Barb Best is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License

Enhanced by Zemanta

9 Responses to “Advice You Know You Want It”

  1. Barbara February 27, 2014 at 2:35 pm #

    Personally, I’d rather read the positive thinking blurbs inside a Dove’s chocolate but that’s just me. Otherwise, thanks for your two cents.

    • Barb Best February 27, 2014 at 5:45 pm #

      Anytime :-)

  2. Janie Emaus February 28, 2014 at 10:18 pm #

    I love the one about Wall Street!

  3. Dawn@LightenUp! March 1, 2014 at 4:56 am #

    Yep! Never trust a therapist without a nice dog. Love it, Barb!

  4. Carol Cassara March 1, 2014 at 6:54 am #

    I had NO IDEA about Hall’s. I’m checking them out!

  5. CF Winn March 3, 2014 at 10:46 am #

    Fun post…you so had me at lime pudding…will share these nuggets of inspiration everywhere I can!

  6. Stephanie N. March 3, 2014 at 4:24 pm #

    Diet advice from someone wearing plus size clothes…LMAO. Classic. great stuff :)

    • Barb Best March 3, 2014 at 4:27 pm #

      She who shall not be named… O – P – R – A – H ?

  7. Vince April 5, 2014 at 2:37 am #

    Hi there, just wanted to mention, I loved this article.
    It was inspiring. Keep on posting!

Leave a Reply